A new Psychology study led by Joel Wong at the Universidad de Indiana finds that gratitude does more for relationships when it is shown through gifts, favors or other actions than when it is expressed only in words. Published in mayo de 2026 in The Journal of Positive Psychology, the research draws a sharper line between saying thank you and doing something that makes the thanks tangible.
The finding is likely to draw attention because gratitude is often treated as a feeling or a phrase, not a behavior with measurable differences. Wong and his team studied two samples of adult Americans, including one group of university students from different racial backgrounds, and built a scale to separate verbal gratitude from conductual gratitude. The two forms were related, but not identical.
That distinction mattered in the analysis. When the researchers tested both forms at the same time, only action-based gratitude stayed positively linked with psychological well-being, social connection and a willingness to respond to the needs of close friends. Words and notes still had value, but they no longer carried the same independent weight once action entered the picture. In other words, a thank-you can matter, yet the data suggest that a thank-you backed by effort matters more.
Wong said that may be because action-based gratitude asks more of the giver. Choosing the right gift, arranging help or returning a favor takes attention, planning and consideration for the other person. That is also why he urged people to tailor gratitude to the recipient rather than pick something they themselves would prefer. His point is simple: the gesture works best when it reflects the other person, not the giver's convenience.
The broader message is not that words should be discarded. They remain part of how people acknowledge kindness and keep relationships moving. But this study adds weight to the idea that gratitude becomes stronger when it leaves the mouth or the page and shows up in something concrete. For adults trying to deepen their closest ties, the question is less whether to say thanks than whether to turn that thanks into something the other person can feel.
